It’s almost Halloween.  My children love to dress up in costumes and run around the neighborhood begging for candy like a bunch of little vagrants.  It’s a chance for them to interact with the neighbors, laugh with their friends, and just enjoy the evening. 

Being someone with Pagan leanings, I obviously also understand the meaning of the holiday for many Wiccans/Neo-Pagans, which is why I find fundamentalist Christian douchebags, who attempt to malign Halloween or Samhain every year so particularly odious.

I have no problem with any religion that doesn’t instruct its followers to a) behead or otherwise maim or kill infidels or b) scare small children into accepting their faith c) try to convert those who have no interest in their myths by knocking on their door, preaching to them or pressuring them in any way.

I’m not particularly super religious.  I have my beliefs, and they’re MINE.  I expose my kids to various faiths and let them read up on different religions.  Teeny has been to church with her friends.  Both Teeny and the Redhead attend synagogue with my dad every so often, and they’ve both attended other Christian gatherings with our neighbors.  They’ve read about Paganism, Judaism, Christianity and even Mormonism!  I would venture to say they’re much more informed and intelligent than your average frothing Pat Robertson follower.

So when I read about these drooling zealots maligning others’ faith and spreading misinformation in order to scare their followers into believing that those of different faiths are evil, I want to gather up the lot of these maggots, bind them with duct tape, and let your average Taliban member go at them with a rusty scimitar.

Enter the shitstains at CBN.  One of these festering douchebags decided to do some “research” into Halloween.  I wonder what kind of sites this cowardly moron visited when attempting to gather information to malign and castigate those who hold a different faith than his own.  I can only imagine…  Fred Phelps would be proud.



“Shock” is the only word to describe what I found. Halloween is a real, sacred day for those who follow Wicca. In fact, it is one of two high and holy days for them. The Celtic belief of spirits being released is current, along with the worship of Samhain (the lord of death) both are promoted as something to embrace on that day. There is no question in my mind that to those who believe and follow the practices of witchcraft, Halloween represents an opportunity to embrace the evil, devilish, dark side of the spiritual world.


So after discovering this, what is a reasonable conclusion? As Christians you and I are placed in this world to be a light in a world of darkness. (And the Jews believe they’re the chosen ones. Want to have a cage match, asshole?) There is no lasting benefit to ignore a holiday that exists around us, but it also does harm to celebrate Halloween as it has originated and grown over the centuries. (Emphasis and commentary mine)

There’s just no end to this guy’s douchebaggitude!  I did a little research into this particular scrote.  “Eric Watt is the Senior Pastor of Greenbriar Church in Chesapeake, Va. and the President of RUN Ministries, a global ministry committed to equip and empower first generation believers to bring the revelation of God and His kingdom to unreached peoples.” 

In other words, this shitslurp has made it his mission in life to pester others into adopting his beliefs, while maligning other faiths.  Charming, asshole.

For starters, no matter how many times frothing fundamentalist fruitcakes try to perpetuate the myth of Samhain as the “Lord of Death,” that claim is patently false.  There was, nor is there now, no major Celtic God called Samhain.  I’ll quote a religious scholar on this one.  PASTOR Dr. Richard Bucher writes:



Myth # 2 — The earliest Halloween celebrations were held by the Druids in honor of Saman, lord of the dead, whose festival fell on November 1. It was the Druid’s belief that on the eve of this festival, Saman called together the wicked souls that within the past 12 months had been condemned to inhabit the bodies of animals. They were released in the form of ghosts, spirits, witches or elves, etc.


Nothing in the extant literature or in the archaeological finds supports the notion that there ever existed a god of the dead known as Samam (sometimes spelled, “Samhain,” pronounced “sow -en”), though hundreds of gods’ names are known. Rather, Saman or Samhain is the name of the festival itself. It means “summer’s end” and merely referred to the end of one year and the beginning of the new. (Emphasis mine)

Oh, but this was on a Lutheran website!  They’re evil.  Not real Christians, right?  I’d like to know how many fundamentalist kooks were thinking that very thing right now.  Go ahead.  Tell me!

For those of you who want to subscribe to the drooling dumbassery of CBN, be my guest.  The only thing I can do is tell you that:

1 – Samhain honors and remembers those who have passed.  Celtic lore says this is a time when the veil separating the the world of the living and the world of the dead is thinnest.  To me, it’s a time to remember those who have died, and many Pagans feel closer to their loved ones, whom they miss very much, on this day.

2 – Samhain is the beginning of winter.  It was traditionally a time to prepare for the winter months, stock up on food, grains, etc. 

3 – Samhain is sometimes described as the “Celtic New Year.”

4 – But mostly, Halloween is fun.  It’s a celebration of harvest, of fall and of leaves turning pretty colors.  For my kids, it’s a time to gorge on sweets, which is something they don’t normally do the rest of the year, as I limit sugar in the house.  It’s a time to get together with friends, walk around the neighborhood and get reacquainted with those who live there.

You want to call that evil?  Be my guest. 

You want to spend Halloween sitting around in your church’s basement praying that the evil Pagan tradition doesn’t place its evil, clammy paws on you on this night?  Up to you.

You knock on my door, spread lies to my kids and attempt to make them out to be evil, and your ass is mine.  I don’t tolerate prejudice and lies, and I won’t allow you around my family.

Got it?  Good.

Hope that’s clear.