Move along, people!  Corruptocrat William Jefferson is completely innocent of stashing away thousands of dollars in his freezer.  He was set up, yo!  Da Man was tryin’ to get him.

The attorney for William J. Jefferson tackled the “elephant in the
room” in opening statements Tuesday, explaining the notorious $90,000
“cold cash” discovered in the former congressman’s freezer as an FBI
setup bid. …

[...]

The defense argued that the former congressman placed the money in the
freezer while he was on vacation to hide it from housekeepers and any
intruders. The fact that the agents found the money in Mr. Jefferson’s
home rather than at a Potomac, Md., house owned by Mr. Abubakar proves
Mr. Jefferson never bribed the Nigerian, the attorney said.

So let’s see if I have this right.  The money was intended for some Nigerian monkey humper… uh… I mean politician, but it never made it to its intended destination.  Instead Da Man put it there as a setup… no wait… he didn’t put it there.  Jefferson put it there, because obviously sticking money into a freezer is much preferable to just putting it in the bank.  Much safer that way.

I tell ya.  I believe it.  I always put wads of cash in my freezer, just in case the hired help gets uppity and decides to buy themselves some new bling.  And Da Man always tries to set me up too!  I know how you feel, Dolla Bill!

He’s innocent, of course!  He didn’t need that cash! 

But Assistant U.S. Attorney Mark Lytle claimed that at the time Mr.
Jefferson and his wife, Andrea, owed more than $100,000 – $62,000 in
credit card debts and $40,000 in bounced-check fees and other
banking-related penalties. This might have motivated the nine-term
congressman, who lost his re-election bid last year, to seek bribes,
the prosecution argued.

Ummmm…. OK…. maybe he did. 

You know… If I owed that much credit card debt and bounced that many checks, I would lose my job!  As a Congressman, this rancid hemorrhoid on the ass of a baboon is privy to some pretty damn sensitive national security information.  There’s a reason people applying for clearances and access to sensitive information are probed and their finances examined.  People with that much debt are more susceptible to bribery, and are more apt to compromise national security information.

But not Jefferson.  Da Man set him up.