Just in case y’all didn’t know it, Paul Krugman is a douche.  I have no idea how this complete ignoramus got a Nobel in Economics or how much cock he had to suck to get it, but as far as I can see he has ZERO integrity.  None. Zilch.  I can’t even believe anyone lets him teach anything or anyone, because I can’t imagine how any of his lectures aren’t tainted by his leftist agenda.

A few months ago, Krugman claimed that the concept of “big government” was a myth. Robert P. Murphy of the Ludwig Von Mises Institute soundly spanked Krugman’s claims, which really makes me wonder just how stupid Krugman thinks his readers are.

As always, let’s make sure we understand what Krugman’s point is. He is claiming that right-wing pundits and politicians were cherry-picking numbers from the temporary Census hiring — shown by the big spike in 2010 — in order to paint a picture of a growing federal government amidst a shrinking private sector.

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But look at Krugman’s own chart: It shows that federal government employment was relatively flat for five years — from 2003 to 2008 — and then it took off quite sharply. Just eyeballing the chart, it looks like federal employment has grown under the Obama administration by about 150,000, even after we net out the temporary Census hiring. If the above chart showed the number of Americans without access to basic health care — and if the last two years occurred under a Republican administration — does anyone doubt that Krugman would point to the shocking surge in the problem?

Murphy debunked so many various Krugman claims, one must wonder how anyone takes this tool seriously.  If I were a student, I’d take his class just so I could ridicule him and prove him wrong at every turn.  Not that I like proving professors wrong, but jesuschristonasegway! This guy is so freakishly biased, he makes Keith Olbermann seem somewhat objective!

Speaking of Olbermann… guess who’s going to work for the Bloated Enema Nozzle of Climate Change™?

I bring up the Goreacle for a reason.  Bear with me people, because the circle is closing.  In his latest screed for the Fishwrap of Record™, Krugman blames the chaos in Egypt on…

Wait for it…

GLOBAL WARMING!!!

That’s right.  Global warming is responsible for heat, cold, rain, hurricanes, snow, childhood obesity, homosexuality, shock jocks, reality TV, skin rashes, athletes foot, belly button lint, crabs, herpes (both simplex 1 and 2), the fad of leg warmers, volcano eruptions, skin eruptions, boils, zits, ingrown hairs, mental illness, nicotine addiction, Carrot Top and Gigli – that really hideous Ben Affleck movie.  But that’s not all, people!  According to Paul Krugman, global warming is also responsible for the riots in Egypt.

We’re in the midst of a global food crisis — the second in three years. World food prices hit a record in January, driven by huge increases in the prices of wheat, corn, sugar and oils. These soaring prices have had only a modest effect on U.S. inflation, which is still low by historical standards, but they’re having a brutal impact on the world’s poor, who spend much if not most of their income on basic foodstuffs.

The consequences of this food crisis go far beyond economics. After all, the big question about uprisings against corrupt and oppressive regimes in the Middle East isn’t so much why they’re happening as why they’re happening now. And there’s little question that sky-high food prices have been an important trigger for popular rage.

So what’s behind the price spike? American right-wingers (and the Chinese) blame easy-money policies at the Federal Reserve, with at least one commentator declaring that there is “blood on Bernanke’s hands.” Meanwhile, President Nicolas Sarkozy of France blames speculators, accusing them of “extortion and pillaging.”

But the evidence tells a different, much more ominous story. While several factors have contributed to soaring food prices, what really stands out is the extent to which severe weather events have disrupted agricultural production. And these severe weather events are exactly the kind of thing we’d expect to see as rising concentrations of greenhouse gases change our climate — which means that the current food price surge may be just the beginning.

Because obviously, there have never been weather fluctuations before. We’ve never had food crises before, and only NOW are we beginning to feel the effects of global warming as the Egyptians riot in the streets!

What. The. Fuck.

Please, do us all a favor, Dr. Krugman – retire yourself to a nice home for the terminally cluefucked and stop polluting the earth with hot air. 

After all, the climate is warm enough already.